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December 26, 2015: "GOD... Is that you?"

"GOD... is that you?" (Light Painting)
"GOD... is that you?"

Hello everyone. I hope that you're all doing well... I've been meaning to tell you something.

From a state of sleep, I slowly woke and tried to open my eyes. But as I really remember things...

I opened my eyes, yet not a single eyelid was lifted. I hardly felt that my body was even there, it was like being suspended in empty space.

Have you ever got that feeling that you're in one place, yet you're also present somewhere else, and everywhere else? 

As if in a strange silent film -- sound was absent, all was darkness. It's funny, because emotion seemed to be absent in that state of darkness too.

Have you ever felt so free, not being inside a body, or not remembering anything about yourself, not even what life outside of the darkness was? Have you felt that way too?

Perhaps I'm already dead. Perhaps not.

All I knew was that


From that state of suspension, some activity finally began to stir. At least somehow, I began to feel uneasy. Awe and questions began to avalanche inside my head.

"Where am I?", I murmured inside my head.

"Who or what was I?"
"Who are my family and friends?"
"What were my favorite things to do?"
"What does sweet, sour or spicy taste like?"
"What does sound... sound... like?"

NOTHING. I just asked in vain. They will never be answered.

"GOD... is that you?" (Light Painting)
Aperture set to f/8.

A beautiful ball of light began to grow in front of me.

It is not hot, it is not cold. It felt like nothing. Just plain beautiful light in the excruciating death of darkness.

I tried to speak, yet there was no mouth. There was no feeling of being inside any vessel. Just my naked soul...

"GOD... is that you?"

"GOD... is that you?" (Light Painting)
Aperture set to f/11.

It was still the same old silence. The same old state of suspension. I tried to float toward the light, but there seems to be no left or right, above or below in this world where I am now. 

But the light just glowed. Over there... far away from my reach. 

The nagging questions did not bother me anymore.

"Am I dead yet? Am I even alive at all?"

"GOD... is that you?" (Light Painting)
Aperture set to f/27.

The light suddenly began to die.

There was a sense of being at peace with oneself.

There was no fear. No emotion. My consciousness seemed to die together with the light...

"Is it merely moving to another dimension?
Who cares anymore, I'm not a scientist..."

* * *
"GOD... is that you?" (Light Painting)
Aperture set to f/38. "The Dying Light."


The 'near-death experience' short fiction popped up in my head as I was about to publish this post. It's kinda shallow really, but I hope it made this post a little interesting.

My original intention of pointing the phone's light into the lens was to see if there was dust inside. Once I saw these images on the LCD, it was too good to let go. Come to think of it, light does look different in every f-stop!

Nikon D5200

Manual Mode

Manual Focus

Shutter Speed: 1/20"

ISO 1000 (the first two), 6400 (the last two)

Since I was already at it, I also took some test shots with light painting. Let's do something grand next time...

"GOD... is that you?" (Light Painting)

"GOD... is that you?" (Light Painting)


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